Thing 4 is a hit!

Once again, not generally my thing, but worthy of an exception - another kid story.

Thing 4 was in his crib last night singing a song, and I started singing the tune to different words, which I thought were funny. He didn't agree and after saying, "No, Abba, don't sing that!" he promptly whacked me on the chest.

Of course, that was not acceptable, so I told him I was leaving. So he started to cry. I said, "Thing 4, why are YOU crying? I'm the one that got hit!" After a few tries from me asking why he was crying, in between wails, he finally got out, "You...don't...have...to...know!"

Then he started calling "Eeeeemmaa!" "What, Thing 4?" "Abba doesn't let me hit him!"

Out of the Mouths of Things

At Musings From Israel, my wife writes about our children, referring to them as Things 1-4. This story should go there, but since it happened to me, it's here.

This morning, Thing 3 asked if I could give her some cottage cheese. As I was spooning some into her bowl, she informed me that she knows how to make cottage cheese. "Really?" I asked. "We learned when our class took a trip to a farm."

"They take a goat and lock his head in one of these things," she says, wrapping one arm behind her head, "but it's not dangerous for them." (Whew!) "Then, they distract it by giving it lots of food. " Now her voice goes very quiet.

"Then they go behind it, and pull on those things and squeeze the milk into a pitcher." "Udders?" I ask. "I don't know what they're called, but cows have them too, and they have more of them, behind... over here," she says, pointing to her behind, "with a pink circle..." She's snickering at the fact that she's discussing a cow's privates.

Now pay attention, here's where it gets complicated:

"Then what?" "And then, blah blah blah blah. And blah blah blah blah blah." (Yes, she's saying the words blah blah blah.) "And blah blah blah blah...and that's it!"

"That's it? Where's the part about how they make cottage cheese?" I demanded. "That was part of the blah blah blah."

So there you have it, folks. Make your own today!

An open letter to Air Canada

June 13, 2007

Air Canada - Customer Relations
PO Box 64239
5512 4th Street, NW
Calgary, AB, T2K 6J0

To Whom This May Concern:

Re: June 10, 2007: AC # 085, Tel Aviv - Toronto

I am writing to express my utter shock and disappointment with the in-flight entertainment on my last flight 3 days ago. Since there were no individual seatback screens on this ancient 767, we were all subjected to viewing the movies chosen for this flight.

The first film was Music and Lyrics which featured a sexy young female pop star who grinds her hips and rubs against others on stage wearing practically nothing. The second film was Austin Powers – The Spy Who Shagged Me. In addition to being unbearably stupid, this movie also flaunted nakedness and frivolous sex. Both these films were rated PG -13.

The Motion Picture Association of America does not determine what is appropriate for my children’s viewing. But even if I followed their standards, PG -13 means that some material is not suitable for children under the age of 13. So how could you show these films on a big screen? It’s one thing if the aircraft had individual seatback screens where parents could control what their children watch. I think it was unconscionable for these films to be shown to all audiences on a big screen. Thankfully, my children were not with me on this flight.

But unless you either enter your fleet into the 21st century and provide individual seatback screens or change your policy on what films are shown on big screen flights, I will not fly Air Canada with my children.

Sincerely,

Wanna Saab


P.S. British Airways goes even further. In addition to individual seatback screens, the flight attendant came over to us and asked my wife which channels she would like to have blocked from our children’s screens. I was very impressed.